I care about girls’ piss too much

My friend and I were talking about something and it somehow ended up with me saying, “She don’t drink no water! Her piss must be piss yellow!” and she burst out laughing saying, “Why do you care so much? You always talk about girls’ piss.” 

Toxic is release by piss and if you are not downing the h2o regularly, I do not want to imagine what the hell fosters in your nest hole. 

0 notes

So this girl I was seeing

is dating somebody new and so the most appropiate thing to do is to stalk them obviously and when I saw him I was like 

"OH MY GOD I’M SO GLAD SHE LEFT ME." 

I can’t express my emotions that well. 

0 notes

are you serious

Read More

0 notes

A Queer Woman Dressed More Feminine to See If It'd Help Her Get a Job. Here's What Happened Next... - RYOT News

(Source: taoofpooh)

3 notes

the boston tea party

usa: oh look at all this tea
england: NO
usa: it would be a shame
england: amerICA NO
usa: if something
england:
usa: were to
england:
england:
england:
usa: happen
75,497 notes

"If you’re under 30 and in a relationship right now, and you’re not head over heels, get out. You are way too young to be wasting your time with someone who doesn’t make you really happy to be with them every day. There’s nothing sadder than watching 23-year-olds settle."

Carolyn Hall, 17 Thoughts for Single Women From A Divorcee  (via mmmmilk)

(Source: mylovelylifeinquotations, via laeng)

75,988 notes

ufocottoncandy:


“Normal is getting dressed in clothes that you buy for work and driving through traffic in a car that you are still paying for - in order to get to the job you need to pay for the clothes and the car, and the house you leave vacant all day so you can afford to live in it.”
 ― Ellen Goodman

ufocottoncandy:

“Normal is getting dressed in clothes that you buy for work and driving through traffic in a car that you are still paying for - in order to get to the job you need to pay for the clothes and the car, and the house you leave vacant all day so you can afford to live in it.”


Ellen Goodman

(via megan15)

92,530 notes

(Source: shit-inmyhead, via undeclaredd)

14,898 notes

MMM MMM MMMMM

MMM MMM MMMMM

(Source: kenzemas)

4,352 notes

(Source: reminiscunt, via girls-that-speak-marcuse)

39,910 notes

Balrgh

Read More

0 notes

He was right.

"I don’t want to make new friends. I like the friends I have now. All I want is someone who wanna wanna."

But I’ve gotten close to this couple I’ve been hanging out with and it’s been super fun? I mean, i do sometime wish they had a cute girl that’d hang out with us b/c I’m always like third wheeling in the end but overall, it’s been really chill. Like good vibe man b/c if I wasn’t in a good mood, I wouldn’t have talked to this girl I saw earlier that day.

This girl started talking to me b/c kiwi started dragging me along the street and called my dog a “rabbit” and blahblah we walked up the hill together but I think she was turned off when I asked, “wow you live here!? How do you afford this?” And she was like, “um, I work a lot.” And I was like, “oh.”

Then this girl was walking down the hill with her dog and omg of course kiwi attacks her and they get into a fight and I was like “OMG I’m so sorry” and she just nodded her head like “ya it’s cool.” Like oh girl someone PLEASE get me a pack of ice I’m burning up like OMG this girl was holding a skateboard with a cig in her mouth and was super cute and I was like, “um why aren’t I talking to her!?” But ya after that, we parted way so I could meet with my friends.

THEN, when we tried to sneaked kiwi up to their apt, their landlord came out b/c he saw us trying to sneak in through the back so we had to meet with their friends at a coffee shop so we could go over to their apt instead! And oh. My. God. There she WAS. I was like, “where’s your dog?” And she said, “oh she’s around the corner smoking bud.” Like OMG staph, your sense of humor, it’s making me … Anyways, it’s really funny b/c before this at work, I was thinking all of the girls I’ve met lately were either from the club, okc, or mutual friends and I was wondering when will I ever meet people out of those scene? But today just bought a new light to me.

My mind was on all kiwi today so I was in a comfortable vibe that I could make dreadful small talk with people.

But I think the reason why I was comfortable with her was bc she looked like a high schooler.

0 notes

He got so much love in #seattle  (at Capitol Hill Neighborhood)

He got so much love in #seattle (at Capitol Hill Neighborhood)

0 notes

(via whoagrin)

229,946 notes

(Source: kpopbodies)

2,573 notes